Why You Don't Need Crystal Clarity to Move Toward What You Want

Yesterday I woke up and meditated for an hour. Then my best girlfriend came over for a little coaching over coffee, I caught up with another friend on a sunny garden patio, then took myself to a sweet local cafe where I reflected on what I felt moved to write about here this week.

Then a walk around the lake, followed by a yoga class.

If you'd asked me 8 years ago — when I verged on tears walking into an office job where I plugged lifeless data into Excel sheets and resented making appointments for other people all day long — if I thought it was possible for me to have Tuesdays like this, I would have laughed.

Actually, I wouldn't have laughed. Because how depressing it felt to go to a job that was sucking the life out of me every day but without the first clue about how to do my life differently wasn't funny at all.

I went to bed with a subtle dread most nights and had to force myself out of bed most mornings. I'd try to stay positive:

My life is good. I have great friends, I live in a fun city, I'm paid decently, I have reasonable hours...I should be more grateful. 

But I often left work feeling heavy and toxic and sad. I was basically a clichéd time clock puncher at age 28, wishing the minutes away most days.

There was nothing overnight about getting from that joyless, purposeless place to this joyful, purposeful one.

I had to learn to trust my gut and to let life unfold at its own pace and in its own way instead of constantly controlling it. I had to be willing to step out of my comfort zone again and again, even when it was...uncomfortable.

These are ongoing, cumulative practices. And this hand-crafted path requires commitment and fortitude and patience, no doubt about it.

But even before I had genuine confidence I could create the kind of life I wanted, a few clues helped me trust I was heading in the right direction enough to keep taking steps forward.

I saw my new life allowing time for regular daily yoga and/or meditation; and I saw being able to have lunch or coffee with friends when I wanted.

When there's something you want but you don't have a clear vision for just yet, it can be easy to get bogged down in the details. Hearing messages like, “You have to be crystal clear on what you want in order to make it happen!” can be overwhelming — and actually counterproductive.

I'm here with good news: You don't have to have it all figured out to get started.

When I saw regular quiet time and flexible time with people I enjoy in my vision, I had no idea how that would play out.

My conditioning still mostly had me believing I had to go to an office job that gave me a regular paycheck for work I felt blah about every day. I believed that was what I should do.

But despite all that doubt, over the years my mind kept wandering back to this intuitive sense that, even though I didn't fully trust the process yet, these things would be woven in a real way into my daily life someday.

Those seemingly small details of the larger vision could be easy to dismiss.

I mean, does being able to have lunch with friends on a Tuesday really seem like a big deal?

Maybe not, but it speaks straight to two of the things I value most in my life — freedom and connection. The "small details" are actually big clues pointing you in the right direction. So you want to pay close attention to them.

Let’s practice.

What's the first thing that pops up when you check in with your gut: 

What do I most want in my life?

No thinking. Just a quick gut check. Trust whatever comes up.

Now close your eyes and take a deep breath and literally see the vision of this thing unfolding before your eyes as if it's already happening.

Again, without thinking, what's the first thing you saw clearly in that vision?

That's likely your one thing to get you started.

Don't sweat the details at first. They'll clarify as you go.

Start with just the ONE thing you know from deep in your being you want - and you see - in your ideal future day. Keep that one thing front and center in your vision; trust it and build on it.

Don't let not knowing all the details hold you back from taking your first step toward what you want right now.

Go with what you do know. But whatever your "one thing" is, trust it. It holds serious truth for you.

Lots of Love,  

Melissa

PS – If you enjoyed this post, thank you for passing it along to someone who might get a boost from it.