Why the M&M Bowl Holds Your Key to Enlightenment (10 Mindful Eating Tips)

Every day at 3pm in my old office job I'd wander from my desk to a nearby assistant's where a coin-free gum ball machine of M&M's lived and mindlessly shovel a few handfuls into my mouth.

I enjoyed them for the 12 seconds or so it took to scarf them down then returned to my desk, already beating myself up for doing something I knew would make me feel crappy (again), with an inevitable sugar crash adding insult to injury every time.

Over time, the habit spread its tentacles. Occasionally I'd pop a few M&M's after lunch; sometimes after morning coffee.

That damn M&M dispenser started running my work life.

It taunted me all day long, distracting me from what I needed to focus on.

I constantly craved feeling those little candy shells melt in my mouth. The blood sugar roller coaster had me anxiously chasing highs and lows all day.

I felt weak and out of control that I couldn't stop this insanity. I no longer just wanted those M&M's — I needed them.

Of course it wasn't just M&M's that made me feel out of control. I'd felt like a victim to food in lots of ways for lots of years.

Cravings drove my days. Managing energy swings was a full time job. I got all agitated when I hadn't gotten my sugar fix, and I constantly felt guilty for eating "bad" things, which twistedly led to eating more things that would make me feel bad the next round.

I was in a lose-lose spin cycle and had zero clue what to do about it.

In fact, I didn't think there was anything I could do about it.

I thought there was something defective about me that I hadn't been able to figure out how to kick these maddening, self-defeating eating habits.

Then one day this question crossed my mind and really hit my gut:

"I wonder what I'm using food to distract myself from?"

No clear answer came at first.

But the more I cultivated mindfulness through meditation and yoga and being coached, I noticed that the guilt and judgment I used to feel after making "stupid" food choices started lightening up.

I noticed some space growing between seeing an M&M dish and "having to" shovel them down.

And I noticed I was starting to enjoy my food for real — not just for a momentary serotonin bump. I was starting to be able to slow down and savor my food rather than pop it like a pill.

And I remember waking up one day feeling like the veil had finally lifted. I didn't have to run around chasing cravings all day that day. I felt even-keeled and peaceful about food for the first time I could remember.

And my relationship with food has been peaceful ever since.

It felt like it had happened magically overnight.

Of course, it hadn't.

Habits we've built over a lifetime — especially habits as emotionally and culturally and socio-economically complicated and multi-layered as eating habits — don't disappear over night.

But simple, bite-sized (pun intended) changes every day can amount to soul-deep shifts in how you relate to food — and by extension to yourself — cumulatively over time.

Because our relationship to food mirrors our relationship to ourselves.

If you're struggling "out there" with food, it's likely that you're also struggling "in here" with yourself.

So the great news is, you can use food as a gateway in to your (truer, more connected, more authentic) Self.

You don't have to keep fighting food. It can be a source of immense joy and insight once you shed the shoulds and tune in to what you're truly craving in your life (not just in your mouth).

Tuning mindfully into your experience with food is a way to start.

And if that notion scares you, don't worry. It's simpler — and maybe even more fun — than you might think. And the results over time might just knock your socks off.

Here are 10 Mindful Eating tips to hep you create a more easeful relationship to food.

  • Before you start eating, get curious and ask yourself "Why am I eating right now?" (No judgment necessary, just noticing: Is it physical hunger or something else?)

  • Sit down to eat (even that handful of M&M's!).

  • Place your hands on your belly and take three deep breaths before you start eating.

  • Minimize distractions. Set aside one meal a day to eat free from phones, computers, TVs, driving, and to-do lists.

  • Take in the colors and smells of your food before you eat it. 

  • Chew each bite 20-50 times, or until it has completely dissolved and moved toward your stomach. (You can start by doing this with 3-5 bites one meal a day.)

  • Put your fork down between bites.

  • Take a deep breath after one bite is gone and before you've taken the next.

  • Notice the flavors, textures, and sensations of each part of each bite on different areas of your tongue. 

  • When you've finished eating, tap into gratitude for the nourishment you've just received. Offer thanks for your meal, then move on with your day.

Connect to what you truly crave underneath that handful of M&M's and you'll connect to yourself at the deepest level.

These mindful eating practices can get you started. Pick one a week to try. Post a reminder note on your fridge. Find an accountability buddy.

And I’ll be wishing you lots of sweet insights and next-level inner connection and soul-level nourishment along the way.

Lots of Love,

Melissa

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