The Load-Lightening Power of Community
Hi friend,
I mentioned here last week that the themes of Connection and Community have been front and center to me these days. Not just for myself, but for us humans as a collective organism.
And I've been really feeling the power of community on a personal level in the aftermath of a death in our family last week.
As different pockets of our community — friend and family community, mamas and preschool community, business and coaching community, neighborhood community — have reached out with support in the form of lasagnes and enchiladas to lessen our shopping and cooking load, offered to take our daughter on playdates so we could have some time to ourselves, checked in periodically during the edging toward end of life process in recent months, and sent thoughtful messages of care and condolence…
What I've been feeling is a bodily sense of being buoyed.
Like the heaviness of the situation has been lightened by the reaching in of all these various arms to disperse the weight of the load.
This is what community does for us, right? It lets us feel capable of handling more than we've felt capable of handling on our own.
It helps lessen our load when things feel too much to bear on our own.
In this way, community and connection are implicitly interwoven. There can be no sense of community without a sense of connection, and a web of connections amongst a group of individuals naturally grows a community.
Sometimes when we're feeling the most depleted, defeated, or alone is when we feel least inclined to reach out for support. But of course those are the moments when we need that buoying the most.
And it does take a deep breath of trust when we're feeling our most tender or vulnerable to put the call out to our community that says, “Hey, you know what, I'm struggling a bit right now and could use a hand" and to have faith that someone will respond with kindness. Often what we discover, though, is that we receive more care, support, and kindness than we could have hoped for once people become aware that we're having a tough time.
In order to support us, our community does have to be made aware when we're struggling though.
How ‘bout you — how do you define community?
Where are you feeling like your load is being lightened by the web of community arms holding you up these days?
Where are there feeling like some gaps or weak ties in your current web?
What are you craving from your community these days?
In what types of situations do you find yourself hesitating to reach out to your community for support even when you're silently deeply craving it?
Where might it be time to send a flare out to “your people” to give them the opportunity to support you in ways they might just not realize you have been needing support?
I hope that this space feels like a little dose of supportive community for you. We need each other. And we know how to rise to the occasion to support one another when we're struggling. We just have to keep trusting that.
With Love,