You're Braver Than You Realize
Some years back as an assignment for an online business course I asked a handful of people who knew me well to share the top three words they would use to describe me.
While a good number of the adjectives that came back didn't surprise me, one that topped the list of responses did:
Brave.
I'd never much considered myself brave, truth be told.
By that point on my intuition-guided path, I'd come upon lots of what I considered "choiceless choice" points.
Forks in the path where, yes, there were a few logically viable choices on paper, but based on what felt clear in my bones, there was really only one way I could possibly go.
I wasn't in the habit of viewing those choices as brave because they just felt so authentically right for me that they felt like no-brainers.
And this is something I often see in my smart, self-aware, spiritually savvy coaching clients too.
The more in tune they become with their most authentic selves and the more they start to trust their own inner wisdom instead of "should's" coming from outside themselves, the more they sometimes overlook how much bravery it actually takes to make those authentically-aligned choices.
Once we get in the habit of making heart-, gut-, and values-aligned choices (which is a habit we can consciously cultivate), it can be easy to forget that operating in that way actually takes a boatload of courage.
Because when it comes down to it, living an authentic life really isn't for the faint of heart.
If it were easy to consistently speak and act in alignment with our truest Selves and deepest inner knowing within a culture that largely conditions us to trust experts "out there" more than our own inner sense, more people would be doing it.
I've been thinking about courage a lot lately both on my own path and as I'm inspired by the courageous steps out of their comfort zone, "big" and "small," I see my clients take every day.
It takes deep courage to allow ourselves to be transformed despite the discomfort that's a necessary part of the process.
It takes courage to take committed action steps in the direction of the life we want to create day after day after day even when we're not sure if "it's working" yet.
It takes courage to be willing to show and share our vulnerability — our imperfectly perfect humanness.
It takes courage to risk failure in the name of following our soul's tugs.
It takes courage to value authentic self-expression over people-pleasing.
It takes courage to act with kindness in environments where blame and judgment are the norm.
It takes courage to speak up on behalf of people who were born with less privilege than our own race or status systematically affords us in this society.
It takes courage to do what feels right on our own path even when others look at us like we're crazy.
It takes courage to make choices counter to what society tells us we "should" do.
It takes courage to breathe through a moment of inner reactivity rather than lashing out with defensiveness or blame.
It takes courage to ask for what we really want even when we're not sure we'll get it.
It takes courage to follow our guts and hearts instead of just our heads.
It takes courage to stay in a tough conversation with the intention to truly understand what another human is needing even when their opinions butt up against our own beliefs.
It takes courage to admit that we were wrong for the sake of deeper intimacy.
It takes courage to put ourselves out there in a new way for the first time.It takes courage to turn our belief away from our Inner Critic’s messages and toward our inner wisdom.
It takes courage to put what feels authentic and important to us out into the world, outcome be damned.
It takes courage to speak and act in alignment with our deepest values even when other people just don't "get it."
It takes courage to be willing to sit with the full range of human emotion without numbing out or pushing away.
It takes courage to trust that life is always unfolding in just the way it's meant to for us even when the ride gets bumpy.
Standing up and speaking up in these authentically aligned ways in the moments of your daily life aren't choiceless acts.
If you're living with intention and integrity with your values — which your mindfulness practice supports you in doing with increasing ease — you're living courageously.
So keep an eye on mini-moments of bravery in your days.
Own them. Keep trusting. And keep going.
Lots of love,